Our Holiday Dinners
by WannaBeBabe
Summary: This is a short little two-shot about Ranger and Stephanie's first holiday dinners together. Babe HEA


_****This is a little holiday Babe story. I started writing this one as part of the challenge Margaret put out on the Babe-Plum Family FB page. To write a one-shot about a meal at both the Plum house and at RangeMan. Well, I didn't stick to the rules as this will be a two-shot. The first takes place on Thanksgiving at the Plum house and the second Christmas at RangeMan. It's very much a fluffy little thing, but it'll give us a Babe HEA. There isn't much Helen or Joe abuse, but I did point out actual things both characters do in canon so there is mild bitch-slapping involved. Rated T, for some swearing because I have a potty mouth. There may also be some mild smut, not positive yet. Posting follow-up tomorrow. Thanks.****_

Chapter 1

The Holiday Dinner…

There wasn't much in life that terrified me anymore. I'd seen and done things that made a man numb to the horrors that were out there. Unfortunately there was still one thing that could scare the shit out of me. Dinner at Mr. and Mrs. Plum's house.

I still wasn't sure how I got myself invited to the circus again, but here I was, walking around the front of my car to open the passenger side door for my, uh, Stephanie. Walking into that house would probably be easier if I could call her my girlfriend or my business partner or some other title, but Stephanie didn't fit into any of those boxes. She kind of leapt from one to another, filling all the roles but never letting me make it official.

I opened the door and gave her my hand. Helping her slide out of my low riding Porsche with a dress on was purely my pleasure. Especially when the top of that dress was cut low enough for me to catch a peek at her breasts. Luckily I was a master at concealing what I was actually looking at and never got caught. I doubted she'd be amused if she knew.

"You look sick," she told me once she was standing at eye level, which was achieved with the sexy, purple heels she was wearing.

"They're already staring at me," I told her, referring to the terrifying pair standing on the front porch watching us. "Don't they have something to cook?"

Stephanie looked over at her mother and grandmother and gave them a little finger wave. "Every woman over the age of ten stares at you," she grumbled. Probably true, but it still didn't make me comfortable with it. "You'll be fine."

I pulled the gun from my back holster and checked the clip. Fully loaded. "I'll be fine," I agreed with what she likes to call Ranger-humor.

She rolled her eyes at me as I stashed the gun. "You know this will be better than being alone at RangeMan."

I reached around her and shut the car door. I was about to disagree with her, but bit my tongue. I'd given most of my men the long weekend off so they could go home to see their families, so I was planning on working twelve hour shifts with the remaining staff to cover monitors and patrols. Our planned holiday dinner was a Shorty's Pizza delivery. I planned for it to be a long and lonely weekend like it always was, but at least it would be quiet, especially compared to the Plum house. Then again, pizza at RangeMan would be lacking one very important thing the Plum house did have…the woman that was holding my hand at the moment. I knew I'd suffer about anything to be with her even for a few hours.

She liked to pretend we didn't have a romantic interest in one another, but her actions didn't lie. She'd probably say she'd only taken my hand so she could tug me toward the front door, but I knew the truth. She enjoyed touching me as much as I loved touching her.

I wasn't about to let her fake indifference bother me today. I'm a self-professed opportunist, after all. So I wrapped my fingers around hers and tugged her back to my side. She lost her balance and tumbled into my chest, just for a moment our bodies were pressed together, but it was enough to get my blood pumping. "You better make this worth my time," I whispered in her ear before pressing a light kiss onto her neck. The words and actions made her react just like I hoped. Her cheeks turned pink, her breath caught, and then she licked her lips nervously. God, I loved that reaction.

"Ranger," she said pushing away. "They're watching." She tilted her head toward the women on the porch.

I felt like rolling my eyes at her this time. She was thirty-four years old, not sixteen. They had to know that there was more than hand holding going on between us, they weren't stupid. "Fine," I sighed. She tugged again and this time I followed behind her, holding the gifts in my opposite arm. "Why's this feel like you're leading me off to be tortured?"

"It's just Thanksgiving dinner. Yeesh, you make it sound like they're going to rip your toenails out."

"I've had my toenails torn out and it's less painful than dinner at your parent's house," I argued.

"Smile," she warned. "And be nice."

Be nice? I'm always nice. They're the ones that needed some lessons in etiquette. Her mother scowls and drinks herself stupid half the day, resulting in some very unseemly things slipping from her mouth during meals. Her grandmother, well, she's asked if I had sex with dogs, grabbed my ass, and snuck into the bathroom to peep while I showered. As for me, I hadn't shot either of them yet. I couldn't get much nicer than that. Could I?

I sighed, for Stephanie I knew I could.

I turned my smile up as I looked at the older women. "Mrs. Plum," I said nodding to her. "Thank you for having me." With that I presented her with a bottle of wine from my personal collection.

"Thank you, uh, Mr. Ranger," she said opening the door for us. "Valerie's kids are down with the flu so we have plenty of room this year."

That was a small miracle. Her sister's brood of four was enough to turn my hair white. "You're welcome," I said grinning at her. "But, please, call me Carlos."

"Carlos," she said like she was testing it out on her tongue. "Well, come in, come in, before the turkey gets dry."

As I stepped up the porch I handed her grandmother a large bouquet of roses. "Mrs. Mazur, you look festive today," I told her. Festive didn't quite cover it. The woman was in brown and orange leggings and a dark brown sweater dress printed with a large turkey on the front. Where the hell do they sell shit like that?

Edna Mazur's blush was almost as dark as Stephanie's as she took the flowers in both hands and took a big sniff. I took that moment to edge around her and get into the house while her hands were full. The woman loved to grope me. If given the chance I knew those boney hands would be full of my ass cheeks. "Did you see these flowers, Steph?" she was saying behind me.

"Those are beautiful," Stephanie told her grandmother. "You should probably get them in water right away, before they wilt."

"Definitely," she agreed and disappeared into the kitchen.

Stephanie caught up and leaned into my side. "Nice distractions," she whispered into my ear as she watched her mother working on the wine cork.

"Always know your enemies' weaknesses," I answered.

She snorted at that, clearly agreeing that I nailed her families' weaknesses. "What's my weakness?" she asked with a hand on her hip like she was poised to argue.

I looked around, noticing the empty dining room, so I pulled her close and turned her against the wall. As soon as she was trapped I brought my lips down on hers, kissing her until she started to slide down the wall. I moved my thigh between her legs to steady her as I broke the kiss. "Your knees," I answered her. "Those are definitely your weakness."

She blinked up at me like she'd forgotten asking me the question. "My knees?" she asked.

I nodded as I touched her lips with my finger. "Next time I'll make sure you're off your feet when I kiss you, so they aren't a problem."

Her eyes grew wide in surprise, then she smiled. "If there is a next time," she smirked, but we both knew there'd be a next time. Especially after that kiss.

"Stephanie," her dad yelled from the living room. "Bring us some beer."

Shit. "Us?" she asked with a confused look on her face.

She pushed away and looked around the corner, so I followed and my suspicions were confirmed. "Shit," she whispered, echoing my thoughts as she looked back at me.

"This should be interesting," I told her with a wink as I stepped around the corner into the living room. "Babe?"

"What?" she asked.

"I'll take a beer too."

She spun on her heels and ran for the kitchen door. "Mom!"

I laughed, imagining there was going to be another disagreement between her and her mother. I, on the other hand, was enjoying the look Detective Morelli was spearing me with. "What are you doing here, Manoso?" he grumbled from his spot on the couch.

"Stephanie invited me," I told him, knowing damned well he didn't get the same invitation. Not this year anyway. Her and Morelli were on the outs again and had been for well over a month.

Mr. Plum looked over at me from his prone position in his recliner. "Rambo," he said with a nod. "We're watching the game."

"Nice," I agreed, sitting on the opposite end of the couch. "I have some money on Carolina."

"Screw the Cowboys," Frank agreed. My exact words, which was why Woody bet me a hundred bucks Dallas would win…at home, with Romo playing. Idiot.

"Gambling is illegal," Morelli told me.

"What are you? The fuckin' police?" Frank Plum grumbled, then laughed at his own joke. "You'd need to arrest half the city if that shit was enforced. Idiot."

I leaned back with a grin on my lips. On this Mr. Plum and I seemed to be in agreement. "Don't get too comfortable here," Morelli whispered to me. "She'll be back in my bed before the night's over." That didn't deserve a reply. "I'll bet you."

I glared back at him. "I don't bet on Stephanie."

Morelli looked up at the doorway and froze. "Shit."

"Did you hear that, Joe? He don't bet on me," she bitched at him as she handed out cans of beer.

"It was harmless, Cupcake," he answered.

I popped my can open and took a long drink of the beer. "Harmless? I could have died in that car explosion," she yelled at him. "I'd be dead, but you'd be fifty bucks richer."

"Two hundred," Morelli corrected her. The guy really was an idiot. Not only did he put money down on when and how she'd blow her car up, but he collected the money before he checked on her health. She wasn't amused…and neither was I.

"Take it outside, this room is for football," her dad told them.

Morelli's face was starting to turn red, but he held his tongue, for once. "If you don't want to die in a car explosion it's time to quit that job," he said quietly, trying not to disturb Frank.

Her eyes narrowed and her nostrils flared in anger and I was glad that look had never been turned on me. "Fine," she growled at him. "I'll quit bounty hunting." All of us looked up at her in surprise, including her dad. "That position still available at RangeMan?"

"Anytime you want it," I told her knowing she wasn't likely to leave her bounty hunting behind just yet, but I liked her to have the option.

"I'll start Monday." And with that she left the room once again.

"She's bluffing," Morelli grumbled. "She's trying to push me."

I shrugged. "Either way I wasn't joking. She can have her job back anytime she wants it."

"You've always taken care of her," Frank said. "I wouldn't mind her working for you."

I nodded in reply. "It's not a favor to her. Your daughter is brilliant. Her mind is an asset to my company."

"She's a smart cookie," Frank agreed, then frowned at Morelli. "About most things."

"Dinner's ready," Helen announced from the doorway.

We all made our way out to the dining room. It was set with seasonal decorations and fall colored cloth napkins. Candles flickered in the center of the table, one on each side of the roses I'd brought, causing me to wonder where the fire extinguisher was located. Morelli pulled out the chair next to Stephanie's normal seat, but Frank stopped him. "That's Rambo's seat. He don't steal my dessert."

Now, Rambo wasn't my favorite nickname, but I figured there was a good chance Frank actually thought my name was Rambo, instead of Ranger, so I shook it off. Besides, I got the chair…and the girl. Morelli grumbled to himself as he rounded the table and took a seat next to Mrs. Mazur.

"Ranger brought me those flowers," she told Morelli, who frowned at them.

"And he brought the wine too," Helen smiled. "I had a little sample and it's wonderful."

Stephanie held her glass up and smiled at her mom. "Fill me up." After the glass was full she took a long drink before looking at me. "I'm sorry," she mouthed.

I smiled back at her and winked. This was turning out to be a lot more fun than I had anticipated. Any time I could cause Morelli to get indigestion was alright in my book.

Frank started to carve the large turkey, while we waited to touch the side dishes. "You ever shoot a turkey, Ranger?" Edna asked.

"No, not a turkey," I told her honestly. I didn't do much game hunting, unless I was in survival mode.

"Only humans," Morelli muttered under his breath. But who the fuck was he kidding? I wasn't the only person at the table to have killed another person. Morelli and Stephanie have both killed in the line of duty, and so has Frank Plum. He was in the Army and saw action in Vietnam.

"I shot a chicken once," Edna told me, ignoring Morelli. I glanced at Stephanie who was shaking her head with silent laughter. "Sucker blew right up. There was meat hanging off these very walls."

I choked on the sip of wine I had just taken. She'd shot a cooked chicken, off the table? Stephanie nodded yes before I could even ask the question. "Well, you have to be careful with a small target like that. Too high a caliber will have that effect."

"I'll have to remember that," Edna agreed, like she might trying shooting dinner again.

"Well, let's keep all the guns away from my turkey," Helen told everyone. "No need to ruin a good meal."

Frank finished carving the turkey, then filled his plate with a good portion before passing the platter to me. I held it for Stephanie while she forked some onto both of our plates, then walked it over to Helen so she could do the same. Then I handed it off to Morelli so he could help Edna. He frowned at me as I took my seat.

Stephanie was filling my plate as she did her own, giving me more vegetables and herself more carbs. "Carrots?" she asked.

"Please."

She smiled and spooned them onto my plate too. "You're not eating any?"

She crinkled her nose in response. "I only feed them to Rex."

I handed her the bottle of honey that Frank had used on his biscuits. "Put a little on the carrots. I think you'll like them that way."

She did as I asked and smiled after trying them. "Ohhh, my, God, Ranger," she moaned, to my delight. "Why has no one sweetened them for me before?"

I leaned closer to her and whispered in her ear, "My abuela did that when I was little, so I'd eat my carrots."

She grinned from ear to ear. I figured it'd amuse her to know I hated veggies when I was a kid. Besides, she loved little personal stories like that. "I still want to meet her."

"Someday," I promised.

"Where did you grow up, Carlos?" Helen asked politely.

"Newark."

"I thought you went to high school in Miami?" Morelli asked, suddenly interested in the conversation.

I nodded once. "I graduated from St. Brendan High School in Miami, but I didn't move to Miami until I was almost sixteen," I answered truthfully.

"You went to Catholic school?" Helen asked with a smile.

"Yes, ma'am." Stephanie was still smiling at me. I guess I never spoke of school before. "I'll show you the photos of me in that green tie sometime," I told her.

"You have photos?"

I nodded. "Ask nicely and maybe I'll show you the photos from my swim meets."

Edna hooted and clapped her hands. "You wear one of those little banana hammocks?"

"Jesus," Frank bitched. "It's Thanksgiving. We're not talking about dongs at the table."

Stephanie tried to hide her laugh, but it barely worked. "I ran cross country too," I told her.

"Quite the little joiner, huh?" Morelli asked like he was mentally filing away all the information.

"Joe's just jealous because he couldn't letter in skirt chasing," Stephanie explained.

I smiled at her and she smiled back so sweetly it made something flutter in my stomach. "Do you still run?" Helen asked, interrupting our exchanged looks.

I nodded in reply. "Everyday." Morelli scowled at me so I pushed it one step further. "A few years ago I did the Ironman Triathlon."

"Is that a race?" Helen asked.

"Yes. It's a 2.4 mile swim, a 112 mile bike ride, and a full marathon run without a break in between. I wasn't a contender, but I finished in just under fourteen hours," I told them.

"Well, Ironman, pass me the yams," Frank said with a look of respect on his face. I nodded back as I passed them. Ironman was definitely a step up from Rambo.

"You never told me that before," Steph whispered to me.

I shrugged. "I was going to take you to the island to see the race course when we were in Hawaii, but we were interrupted."

Her face turned pink when she thought about our time in Hawaii. I regretted not moving faster on that trip. I should have known Morelli would interrupt us. From even twelve hours away the guy got in the way. If I'd just told her that I loved her then, we'd probably be together now.

"Well, hot dog, an Ironman," Edna sighed. "Can't do much better than that, Stephanie."

"Are you kidding me?" Morelli shouted. "He's a thug, a liar, and he's using her. How can you be sharing a meal with someone like him?"

Helen looked shocked as Frank stood. "Ranger?"

"Yes, sir," I answered even though the older man was glaring at Morelli.

"Have you ever molested or misused my daughter?"

"No."

"Have you ever dishonored her by scribbling disgusting words about her private parts on public walls?"

"No, sir."

"Have you ever been discharged from the military for questionable reasons?"

"No, sir."

"Have you ever used my daughter to solve one of your cases, then taken the credit for yourself?"

"No, sir. She is always fully compensated for her work."

He nodded. "Have you ever verbally abused her or belittled her in front of half the town?"

"Never."

"Have you ever implied you wouldn't commit to her unless she changed her entire life for you?"

"No."

"Have you ever lied to her about being with another woman?"

"There's no other woman," I answered honestly.

"Well, then," Frank said, still glaring at Morelli. "Detective, it seems Ranger isn't the man unfit to dine with my family."

"Mr. Plum…"

"Get out of my house," Frank cut him off. "Don't darken my doorstep again."

Morelli looked to Helen for help, but she was so stunned by her husband's outburst she didn't seem to notice. Then Morelli's eyes turned to Stephanie. I followed suit, looking at her too. She was staring up at me, like she'd just been sucker punched. "Babe?" I asked.

"I'm an idiot," she said, then the next thing I knew she was out of her chair, her lips were on mine, and her arms were wrapped around my shoulders.

"Stephanie!" Morelli growled.

I eased her back, breaking the kiss, but we never broke eye contact. "Later," I told her.

She nodded, as she stumbled backward into her chair. "Joe, you should probably go," she finally answered him. "We can talk later."

"You're all going to be sorry," he bitched as he pushed away from the table. "If you think the burg's just going to accept her being with him you're all crazy. You'll all be laughingstocks."

"She's old enough to make her decisions, mistake or not we stand by her, just like we did when she dated you," Frank answered. "And the burg can suck my…"

"Frank," Helen said, startled into action. "You need to leave, Joseph. I shouldn't have invited you."

Morelli grumbled as he stalked off to the front door. As soon as the door slammed Edna cackled. "You told him, Frank."

"I should've shown him the door years ago," he grumbled as he took his seat at the head of the table. "Now, let's finish up before I miss the next game."

We finished the meal in relative silence. I even took a slice of pumpkin pie when offered. "You're eating pie," Stephanie whispered. "I thought you didn't eat pie."

Oh she knew very well that I enjoyed eating pie, so I smiled at her until she started to flush again. I put the pumpkin pie in my mouth, then licked my lips after I swallowed. She was about to say something else so I leaned over and whispered in her ear again, "Later, babe."

"We should get going," she announced suddenly. "Ranger has to work tonight."

Her mother wasn't fooled for a moment. "Well, Dad can drive you home if he needs to get going."

Stephanie squirmed in her seat, but wasn't put off. "No, Ranger said he's shorthanded tonight. I'm going to help him out, on patrol. You know, since I'm officially working for him again," she babbled.

"Mm hmm," her mother said looking from Stephanie to me, then back again. "Would you like some left overs? Patrolling can work up an appetite."

"Uh, sure," Stephanie answered looking at me for help.

"Thank you, Mrs. Plum. We'd appreciate that. My housekeeper has the weekend off."

Stephanie followed her mother and grandmother into the kitchen to help pack up the left overs, but I was sure there was a little more than just food storage being discussed though I doubted I'd ever learn the truth of it.

"Since I'm on a roll," Frank said startling me from my thoughts. "I expect you to treat her better than the other jokers she's brought home."

"I'll do as much as she allows me," I said, letting him know I'd do more if she wouldn't protest so hard.

"Well, at least you listen to her," he said as he licked his pie fork and moved himself back to the living room.

I picked up all the dishes and carried them to the kitchen like I always do for my mother on holidays. "We'll just do some damage control," Helen was saying. "The truth makes what Joseph says seem like the jealous ramblings of a jilted lover."

"Mom, just leave it alone," Steph sighed. "Please."

"I cleared the table," I interrupted.

"Oh, Carlos," her mother smiled. "You didn't have to do that. Put them on the counter."

I followed her direction, then picked up the bag that was filled with containers of turkey and the fixings. "You ready?" I asked Steph.

"Yeah."

"Thank you for a wonderful dinner, Mrs. Plum," I told her. "Mrs. Mazur, it's always a pleasure." I even winked at her grandma, why not, it was the holidays.

"Please, make sure you join us for Christmas too," Helen offered.

I looked over at Stephanie. She looked just as terrified as I felt. "Actually, I was hoping Steph would have Christmas dinner with me."

Her face lit up and a smile spread across her face. "Really?" I nodded yes. "Alright."

Alright. Christmas Eve, alone with Steph. Four weeks to prime her for what I had in mind. Damn, this was going to be good.


End file.
